A definition of God

|There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted.
Category: Ethnical Jokes - 0 Comments

Knock Knock
Who's there !
Arson
!
Arson who !
Arson McCullers !
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Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says " I'm a Y.U.P.P.I.E, you know... Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist." The second guy says "I'm a D.I.N.K, you know... Double Income, No Kids." The third guy says, " I'm a R.U.B, you know... Rich, Urban, Biker.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

"Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest in the stock market," said the man.
Category: Relationships - 0 Comments

A Frenchman, an Englishman, an American man,
and a
lawyer were sitting on a train.

The Frenchman offered
everyone some of his baguette, then threw it out
the window, saying,
"Don't worry - we have plenty of those where I
come from.
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ValueJet: When you just can't wait for the world to come to you. ValueJet: We're Amtrak with wings. Join our frequent near-miss program. On flights, every section is a smoking section. Ask about our out-of-court settlements. Our staff has had lots of experience consoling next-of-kin. Are our jet engines too noisy? Don't worry. We'll turn them off.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Q: What's the best place to photograph
Clinton
Administration officials?
A: A police lineup.
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An Eagle is circling at about 5,000 ft. when he spies a field mouse down below him. He dives down and eats the mouse. After a little while the mouse works his way out the eagles butt. Proceeding to look around the mouse says: "Tail gunner to pilot...Tail gunner to pilot.."The eagle says "what do you want?"The mouse asks how high up they are.
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments

Two Canadian guys, Mike and Rob were on

the roof, laying tile, when a sudden gust of wind came and knocked
down
their ladder.
"I have an idea," said Mike. "We'll throw
you down, and then you
can pick up the ladder."

"What, do
you think I'm stupid? I have an idea.
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During my stay at an expensive hotel
in New York
City, I woke up in the middle of the night with an
upset stomach. I
called room service and ordered some soda crackers.
When I looked at the
charge slip, I was furious. I called room
service and raged, "I know
I'm in a luxury hotel, but $11.
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