A fortunate coincidence

What would you get if you crossed a new-born
snake
with a basketball?
A bouncing baby boa.
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Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch.As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton,"Are you ready to order?"Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd like a quickie.""A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given the currentsituation of your personal life I don't think that is a good idea.
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Three boys were sharing
the same bed on
holiday, but it was so crowded that one of them decided
to sleep on the
floor. After a while, one of his friends told him he
might as well
get in to bed again. There's lots of room now,' he
said.
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Why did the pervert cross the road?He was stuck to the chicken.
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Where do you find monster snails?
On the
end of monsters fingers.
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A blonde, a brunette, and a
man are driving
in their pick-up truck. The brunette was sitting up front
with the
man and the blonde was in the back. While driving across a
bridge
the man lost control of the truck and drove over the side of the

bridge.
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How come wrong numbers are never
busy?
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Judge: You stated that the stairs went down to

the basement, is that correct?
A: Yes.
Judge: And these same
stairs, did the also go up?
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How many maintenance programmers does it take

to change a light bulb?
None. They try to fix the old
one.
"We looked at the light fixture and decided there's no point trying

to maintain it. We're going to rewrite it from scratch. Could you wait

two months?"
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I've noticed the strangest thing about men who hang out in bars a lot. It seems they have only one of two reasons to be there: They have no wife to go home to... or they do.
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