Beauty jokes

What usually happens when a man puts his best foot forward?It ends up in his mouth!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit?The bucket.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot
?
A carrot !
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your mamma is so fat when she steps on the scales it says one at a time please.
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|Which fly makes films?Stephen Speilbug!
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A woman went to her shrink because she was having severe problems with her sex life. The psychiatrist asked her many questions but did not seem to be getting a clear picture of her problems. Finally he asked, "Do you ever watch your husband's face while you are having sex?" "Well, yes, I actually did once.
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Why did the owl, owl ?
Because the woodpecker
would peck 'er !
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Do you know why the tribes of Israel wandered in the desert for 40 years?Because even then, men couldn't stop to ask directions.
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How do you make a blonde laugh on a Wednesday?
Tell
her a joke on a Monday!
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Question: What's the penalty for bigamy?Answer: Two mothers-in-law
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