Blonde Sky Divers

What do you get if you cross
a giant, hairy
monster with a penguin?
I don't know but it's a very tightfitting
tuxedo.
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Q: What goes "krab, krab, krab"? - A: A dog
barking in a
mirror.
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Two really
old guys decided they would go
out and try to play a round of
golf together. They get on the first
tee and the first old guy says to
the
second, "My eyesight
isn't what it used to be. Can you watch my ball
for
me?".
The
second guy says, "Sure! I see fine. Go ahead and hit.
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The best way of saving money is to forget who

you borrowed it from.
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Why wouldn't anyone play with the little

longhorn?
He was too much of a bully!
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An Irishman walks out of a pub, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand.A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you lad?""Yesh, Shombody shtole me car!", the Irishman replies.The cop asks, "Well now, where was your car last time you saw it?""It was at the end of this key.
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Judge: You claim you robbed the grocery

store because you were starving. So why didn't you take the food
instead
of the cash out of the till?
Burglar: Your Honour! I'm a
proud man, sir, and I make it a rule to
pay for everything I eat.
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Six Bad Days1. The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, they were both eaten by a killer whale.2.
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A retiring farmer in preparation for selling
his
land, needed to rid his farm of animals. So he went to every
house in his
town.

To the houses where the man is the boss, he
gave a horse. To the houses
where the woman is the boss, a chicken
was given.

He got toward the end of the street and saw a couple
outside gardening.
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Fan: I've always admired you. Are your teeth

your own?
Actor: Whose do you think they are?
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