
Business jokes
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A young
ensign had nearly completed his
first overseas tour of sea duty when he
was given an opportunity to
display his ability at getting the ship
under way. With a stream of
crisp commands, he had the decks buzzing with
men and soon, the
ship had left port and was streaming out of the
channel.
The
ensign's efficiency has been remarkable. In fact, the deck was
abuzz
with talk that he had set a new record for getting a destroyer under
way. The ensign glowed at his accomplishment and was not all surprised
when another seaman approached him with a message from the
captain.
He was, however, a bit surprised to find that it was a radio
message,
and he was even more surprised when he read, "My personal
congratulations upon completing your underway preparation exercise
according to the
book and with amazing speed. In your haste, however,
you have
overlooked one of the unwritten rules -- make sure th
e captain is aboard before
getting under way!"
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|Theorem: 4 = 5Proof:-20 = -2016 - 36 = 25 - 454^2 - 9*4 = 5^2 - 9*54^2 - 9*4 + 81/4 = 5^2 - 9*5 + 81/4(4 - 9/2)^2 = (5 - 9/2)^24 - 9/2 = 5 - 9/24 = 5
Category: Stats/Math Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Stats/Math Jokes - 0 Comments
|There were three people stranded on an island, a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore. So she announced, "I'm going to try to swim to shore." So she swam out five miles, and got really tired.
Category: Blonde Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Blonde Jokes - 0 Comments
St. Peter and Satan
were having an argument
one day about baseball. Satan proposed a game
to be played on
neutral grounds between a select team from the heavenly
host and his own
hand-picked boys.
"Very well," said the gatekeeper of Heaven.
"But you realize, I
hope, that we've got all the good players and
the best coaches.
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were having an argument
one day about baseball. Satan proposed a game
to be played on
neutral grounds between a select team from the heavenly
host and his own
hand-picked boys.
"Very well," said the gatekeeper of Heaven.
"But you realize, I
hope, that we've got all the good players and
the best coaches.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
|Subject: You Deserve a Break TodaySan Francisco (UPI)--In what legal observers are already calling a landmark decision in the case of Jackson v. California, the California Supreme Court has recognized for the first time a constitutional right to chicken done right.
Category: Police Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Police Jokes - 0 Comments
|A programmer and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from Los Angeles to New York.The programmer leans over to the engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game.The engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
Category: Aviation Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Aviation Jokes - 0 Comments
What is green, sooty and whistles when it rubs
its
back legs together ?
Chimney Cricket !
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its
back legs together ?
Chimney Cricket !
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Did you hear about the football team who ate
too much pudding ?
They got jellygated !
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too much pudding ?
They got jellygated !
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Tourist guide at zoo: "Ladies and gentlemen, this is the elephant, thelargest animal to roam the lands. Every day the elephant eats 3 dozen bunches of bananas, 6 tons of hay, and 2000 pounds of assorted fruits. Madam, please don't stand near the elephant's backside.... Madam, PLEASE don't stand near the elephant's backside ... MADAM ... MADAM ...
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments
A student was heading home for the holidays.
When she got to
the airline counter, she presented her ticket to New
York. As she gave
the agent her luggage, she made the remark, "I'd
like you to send my
green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase
to London."
The confused agent said, "I'm sorry, we can't do
that.
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When she got to
the airline counter, she presented her ticket to New
York. As she gave
the agent her luggage, she made the remark, "I'd
like you to send my
green suitcase to Hawaii, and my red suitcase
to London."
The confused agent said, "I'm sorry, we can't do
that.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments


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