Cannibal jokes

Q: Why is a violist like a terrorist?A: They both fuck up bowings.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes Unembarrassed to wear fur. No need to worry about tax returns Glorious military history... well, until about 400 a.d. Can wear sunglasses inside Political stability Flexible working hours Live near the Pope Country run by Sicilian murderers
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A husband and wife stepped up to view the body of his mother-in-law. As he began to cry, his wife punched him and said: Why are you crying, you never liked my mother anyway. I know he replied, I thought I saw her move!
Category: Clean Jokes - 0 Comments

McPherson walked
into a
bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the

olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and

all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave.
"S'cuse
me," said another bar patron, who was puzzled over what
McPherson
had done.
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An
internal auditor for a manufacturing
group was concerned about anomalies in
stock levels. He thought
someone might be pinching stock but he
couldn't prove it. He had his
eye on one shifty-looking individual who every
day drove his old
truck out of the factory with the load covered by a
tarpaulin.
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Three old men are
sitting on the porch of
a retirement home. The first says, "Fellas, I
got real problems.
I'm seventy years old. Every morning at seven
o'clock I get up and
I try to urinate. All day long I try to urinate. They
give me all
kinds of medicine but nothing helps.
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A Sunday school teacher was giving her class the assignment for the next week. "Next Sunday," she said, "we are going to talk about liars, and in preparation for our lesson I want you all to read the of Mark.
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"I came in to
make an appointment with the
dentist." said the man to the receptionist.

"I'm sorry sir."
she replied. "He's out right now, but..."

"Thank you,"
interrupted the obviously nervous prospective patient.
"When will he be out
again ?"
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Three guys and a lady were sitting at the bar talking about their professions. The first guy says " I'm a Y.U.P.P.I.E, you know... Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist." The second guy says "I'm a D.I.N.K, you know... Double Income, No Kids." The third guy says, " I'm a R.U.B, you know... Rich, Urban, Biker.
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What does an educated owl say?
Whom.
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