Car and train jokes

How do you blind a woman? Put a windshield in front of her face!
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Two mountain bred GIs were wandering the streets of calcutta when an old woman walked by. "Hey, Billy Joe," one said, "I think that's Mother Teresa." "Your nuts." "I'm telling you."They approached the woman and one asked, "Are you Mother Teresa?" The old lady eyed them scornfully. "Fuck off, you goddamn perverts," she hissed, striding off.
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What snakes are good at sums ?
Adders !
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How much is 5Q and 5Q? 10Q. "You're welcome.

"
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What comes out at night and goes Munch, munch,

ouch!
A vampire with a rotten tooth.
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A little
boy came downstairs crying late one
night.
"What's wrong?" asked his mother.
"Do people really come
from dust, like they said in church?" he
sobbed.
"In a way they
do," said his mother.
"And when they die so they turn back to
dust?"
"Yes, they do."
The little boy began to cry again.
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You know why a dog licks his ass?Because he knows in five minutes he'll be licking your face.
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The Long Walk Home by Miss D. Buss
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The cannibal king was having
dinner when
a servant came running in.
"Your Majesty," he said, "the slaves are
revolting!"
"You don't have to tell me," said the king. "I'm
trying to eat
them.
"Where did we get these slaves anyway?"
"From
the country next door," replied the servant.
"We must get a new
butcher," said the king.
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A husband, tired of his wife asking him how she looks, buys her a full length mirror. This does little to help, as now she just stands in front of the mirror, looking at herself, asking him how she looks.One day, fresh out of the shower, she is yet again in front of the mirror, now complaining that her breasts are too small.
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