Car and train jokes

A pregnant woman is about to give birth. The doctor has her on thedelivery table, legs up in the stirrups. Suddenly, he sees the topof a head push through. Then the baby pops its head out and saysto the doctor, "Are you my dad?". The doctor says, "No, I am your doctor!". With that, the baby popsright back inside. "Damn!", says the doctor.
Category: Relationships - 0 Comments

Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

What do you feed a 600 pound
Gorilla?
Anything it wants!
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A woman got a problem with her closet door - it was felling every time a bus was passing by. So she called a repair man. The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls out every time when a bus passes by. "OK, I am gonna see what is going on, just close the door behind me" and he stepps into the closet.
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What kind of street does a ghost like best?
A
dead end.
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Knock Knock
Who's there !
Census
!
Census who ?
Census presents for Christmas !
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Men don't
get lost; they discover alternative
destinations.
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Little Johnny was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence.Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was doing, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Johhny?""Well, my goldfish died," replied Johnny tearfully, without looking up,"and I've just buried him.
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When Ralph first noticed that his penis was growing larger and staying erect longer, he was delighted, as was his wife. But after several weeks his penis had grown to nearly twenty inches. Ralph became quite concerned, so he and his wife went to see a prominent urologist.
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It's a beautiful warm spring day and a man and his wife are at the zoo. She's wearing a cute, loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless w/straps. As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in front of a very large gorilla, the gorilla goes ape.
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments