Christmas jokes

How are daughter's boyfriends like cockroaches?They hang around the kitchen and it's hard to get rid of them!
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

VERBS:to schmooze = befriend scumto pitch = grovel shamelesslyto brainstorm = feign preparednessto research = procrastinate indefinitelyto network = spread disinformationto collaborate = argue incessantlyto freelance = collect unemploymentNOUNS:agent = frustrated lawyerlawyer = frustrated producerproducer = frustrated writerwriter = frustrated
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a

snowman?
Frostbite.
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Creative Sighing for Effect. Sigh loudly when there aremany people around, giving the impression that you arevery hard pressed.
Category: At Work - 0 Comments

Bill:"My homework is really difficult
tonight, I've to
write an essay on an elephant."?
Bert:"Well, for a
start your going to need a big ladder.."
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At a medical
convention, a male
doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other. The male
doctor
asks her to dinner and she accepts. As they sit down at the

restaurant, she excuses herself to go and wash her hands.

After dinner,
one thing leads to another and they end up in her hotel
bedroom.
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Mama bear to Papa bear:
"Well... You
might call it hibernating -- I call it 'goofing
off'."
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Doctor, Doctor I dream there are
monsters
under my bed, what can I do?
Saw the legs off of your
bed!
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A man needing a
heart transplant
is told by his doctor that the only heart available is
that of a
sheep. The man finally agrees and the doctor transplants the
sheep
heart into the man. A few days after the operation, the man comes in

for a checkup. The doctor asks him "How are you feeling?" The man

replies "Not BAAAAD!"
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Six guys were playing poker when Smith loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect fortheir fallen comrade, the other five complete their playing timestanding up. Roberts looks around and asks, "Now, who is going to tell the wife?" They draw straws.
Category: Situations - 0 Comments