Confucious say: Man who go to bed.......

Resolving to surprise her husband, an

executive's wife stops by his office.

As she walks in
unannounced, she finds his secretary sitting on his
lap.

Without
hesitating, he begins to dictated a letter... "And in
conclusion
gentlemen, budget cut or not, I cannot continue to operate this
office
with just one chair.
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William Bennett recalls when one of his "radical students" at Boston University announced that he and his girlfriend were getting married for "as long as we feel good about each other."It seemed rather temporary to Dr. Bennett, so for a wedding present, he says, "I gave them paper plates."
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Why are politicians like diapers?Both should be changed regularly and for the same reason.
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TOP 10 REASONS BASEBALL IS BETTER THAN SEX...10. IT IS LEGAL TO PLAY PROFESSIONALLY 9. YOU CAN COUNT ON IT AT LEAST 4 TIMES A WEEK 8. YOU HAVE A COACH TO TELL YOU WHEN TO ADVANCE 7. WHEN YOU ARE TIRED, YOU ALWAYS GET RELIEVED 6. IF YOU STRIKE OUT ONCE, YOU STILL HAVE AT LEAST 2 MORE TIMES TO GET A HIT 5. UP TO 4 PEOPLE CAN SCORE AT ONCE 4.
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Joan, a rather well-proportioned & near-sighted secretary, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first few days, but always removed her glasses for an even facial tan. After several days she decided that no one could see her way up there, so she slipped out of her suit for an overall tan.
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What's the difference between a monster

and a mouse?
A monster makes bigger holes in the skirting board.
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I wonder what happened to that dumb blonde I

went out with.
I dyed my hair !
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There was this guy who bought an elderly circus elephant. Alas, he couldn't afford to feed it. He'd never seen an elephant jump with all 4 feet off the ground. So he started a contest: entry was $10, and the first person to get the elephant to jump with all 4 feet off the ground would get $50,000.
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A concerned husband went to a
doctor to
talk about his wife. He says to the
doctor, "Doctor, I think my wife
is deaf because she never hears me
the
first time and always
asks me to repeat things." "Well," the doctor
replied, "go home and
tonight stand about 15 feet from her and say
something to her.
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Bill, Hillary and Chelsea Clinton are on Air Force One.Bill says to Hillary, "I could make a lot of people very happy if I threw 1 million $1 bills out of this plane."Hillary says, "Oh yeah, well I could make even more people happy if I threw 1 million $5 bills out of this plane.
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