Diff Between Bar and Clitoris

|A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. What's the problem?" "My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000." "Gee, that's tough," he replied. "Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leaving me $90,000." "Wow.
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A chap went up to the counter in the
library
and said, "Have you got any books about committing
suicide?"

The librarian said, "Yes. Take a look over there, somewhere on
the
middle shelf."

The chap came back a few moments later and
said, "I can't find any at
all."

The librarian replied,
"Yes, it's awful.
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A small balding man storms

into a local bar and demands, "Gimme a double of the strongest
whiskey
you got. I'm so mad, I can't even see straight." The
bartender,
noticing that the little man is a bit the worse for wear, pours
him a double
of Southern Comfort. The man swills down the drink and
says, "Gimme
another one.
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Why didn't the dog want to play football?
It
was a boxer!
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|Q: How do you know if you cat's got a bad cold?A: He has cat-arrh!Q: What is cleverer than a talking cat?A: A spelling bee!Q: How do you know that cats are sensitive creatures?A: They never cry over spilt milk!Q: What do you get if you cross a cat and a gorilla?A: An animal that puts you out a night!Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a
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There was an airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa. It suddenly had a malfunction and went down. A few weeks later, PepsiCo sent a rescue plane out to look for the lost plane. They found the wreckage but were unable to locate the crew. They searched the area and found a tribe of cannibals.
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Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to

dress up for Halloween.
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A blonde, brunette and a redhead were all in a swimming race. They were supposed to swim the English Channel.A group of spectators anxiously awaited the three women at the finish line. The brunette came in first, then the redhead a little later. They waited hours for the blonde to show up.
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A man walks
into a shoe store, and tries
on a pair of shoes. "How do they feel?"
asks the sales
clerk.
"Well they feel a bit tight," replies the man.

The assistant
promptly bends down and has a look at the shoes and at
the man's feet.
"Try pulling the tongue out," the clerk says.

"Well, theyth
sthill feelth a bith tighth."
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We have all heard of the ten commandments.Well recently a new eleventh commandment was made. Just for President Clinton."Thou shalt not put thy rod in thy staff."
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