Difference between a cat and a dog...

These are supposedly actual signs that have been found in and around parts of England.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

After years of marriage, Ole and Lena found themselves in bed one night. Lena leaned over to Ole and said, "Ole, have you ever been unfaithful during all our years of marriage?""Not even once!" exclaimed Ole. "Lena, have you ever been unfaithful?""Well, er, yes --- but only three times," she admitted somewhat embarrassed.
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An old lady walked in to the post
office to
buy stamps and as she was short-sighted the clerk offered to
stick
the stamps on for her.

`Wait a minute,' he said, `you've
written the address upside down.'


`I know,' said the little
old lady, `the letter is going to
Australia.'
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The Perverse Guide To Getting HiredChapter 1 - The Resume Your resume is a crucial document that summarises theessence of your being to a potential employer. You must graba personnel director's attention with your sheer, overpoweringwonderfulness, or your vitae will wind up lining the bottom ofher parakeet's cage.
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Top 10 Rejection Lines Given By Women (and what they actually mean...)10. I think of you as a brother. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.")9. There's a slight difference in our ages. (You are one jurassic geezer.)8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes upon.) 7.
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There was once a very prim and proper older lady who had a problem with passing gas. Since she came from a generation when people didn't even talk about this kind of problem it took a long time for her to seek help. Finally, however, she was persuaded to consult her family doctor.
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|Bottle feeding: An opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2 am too.Defense: What you'd better have around de yard if you're going to let the children play outside.Drooling: How teething babies wash their chins.Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
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Why did the fly fly ?
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Diamonds are a girl's best friend. Dogs are man's best friend. So which is the dumber sex?
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A couple of old guys were golfing
when one
said he was going to Dr. Taylor for a new set of dentures in
the
morning.

His friend remarked that he had gone to the same dentist a
few years
before. "Is that so?" the first said.
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