Dragging your feet

Mother: Does your teacher like you ?
Son:
Like me, she loves me. Look at all those X's on my test paper
!
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An avid duck hunter was in the market for a new

bird dog. His search ended when he found a dog that could actually
walk
on water to retrieve a duck. Shocked by his find, he was sure
none of
his friends would ever believe him.
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What has eighteen legs and fetches a ball?
The
Philadelphia Beagles!
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What sort of perfume do snakes prefer ?

Poison by Christian Dior !
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Q: Why do Blondes take the pill?A: So they know what day of the week it is.
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10. You can usually find someone to do it with. 9. If you get tired, you can stop, save your place and pick up where you left off. 8. You can finish early without feelings of guilt or shame. 7. When you open a book, you don't have to worry about who else has opened it. 6. A little coffee and you can do it all night. 5.
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How did the woman feel when she got run
over by a
car?
Tired.
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Three people die, a Doctor a school
teacher
and the head of a large HMO, when met at the pearly gates by
St. Peter he
asks the Doctor 'what did you do on
Earth?'

The Dotor replied, I healed the sick and if they could not pay I would

do it for free. St. Peter told the Doctor, 'you may go
in.'

St.
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-How do you get down from an elephant?You don't. You get down from a duck.-Why did the elephant paint himself all different colors?So he could hide in the crayon box.-Why do elephants have wrinkles?Because they are so hard to iron.-Why did the elephant put skates on before he went to bed?Because he wanted to get rolling in the morning.
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|We yell for the Government to balance the budget, then take the last dime we have to make the down payment on a car. We whip the enemy in battle, then give them the shirt off our backs. We yell for speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won't buy a car if it can't go over 100 miles an hour.
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