Elephant jokes

Mary was having an affair during the day while her husband,John, was at work. One day she was in bed with her boyfriend,Ralph, and she heard her husband's car pull in the driveway.
Category: Situations - 0 Comments

"What flavors of ice cream
do you have?"
inquired the customer.
"Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate,"
answered the new waitress in a
hoarse whisper.
Trying to be
sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have
laryngitis?"
"No...."
replied the new waitress with some effort, "just...erm....
vanilla,
strawberry, and chocolate."
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I wonder what happened to that dumb blonde I

went out with.
I dyed my hair !
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"Things are more like they are now than they have ever been." --President Gerald Ford "My fellow astronauts..."--Vice-Presi dent Dan Quayle, beginning a speech at an Apollo 11 anniversary celebration. "Capital punishment is our society's recognition of the sanctity of human life.
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Patron 1: I eat at a different restaurant
every day.
Patron 2: I don't tip, either.
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One day there were
two boys playing by a
stream. One of the young boys saw a bush and went
over to it and the
other boy couldn't figure out why his friend was at
the bush so
long. The other boy went over to the bush and looked. The
two boys
were looking at a woman bathing naked in the steam.
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Why do
elephants do well in school
?
Because they have a lot of grey matter !
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What does the N on the Nebraska
football
helmet stand for?
"Nowledge."
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How many evolutionists does it take to
change a light
bulb?
Only one, but it takes eight million years.
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Three Pastors from the south were having

lunch in a diner. One said, "Ya know, since summer started I've been

having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I've
tried
everything-noise, spray, cats-nothing seems to scare them away.


Another said, "Yea, me too. I've got hundreds living in my
belfry and
in the attic.
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