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Jesus and Moses are sitting in a boat fishing and Jesus says to Moses "I want to do a miracle so we can feel like the good old days." and Moses says "Yeah sure." So Jesus gets up and says "I think I'll walk on the water, that was always a good one." So Jesus walks over to the edge of the boat, steps into the water, and sinks like a stone.
Category: Religion - 0 Comments

Q: What is the difference
between a
flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic

light?
A: The color.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments

Next time you're invited to a boring social event, try one of these excuses to why you can't attend:I'D LOVE TO BUT...... I don't want to leave my comfort zone. ... I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary. ... I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters. ... I have to fluff my shower cap. ... I have to fulfill my potential. ...
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by God... "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Jesus walks upon a crowd with an adulteress crouching in a corner with a mob around her preparing to stone her to death.Jesus stops them and says, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone!"Suddenly a woman at the back of the crowd fires off a stone at the adulteress and blasts her right in the head.At which point Jesus looks over and says...
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

|OLD MUSICIANS never die, they just get played outOLD MUSICIANS never die, they just go from bar to barOLD NUCLEAR POWER PLANTS never die, they just go off-lineOLD NUMERICAL ANALYSTS never die, they just get disarrayedOLD OWLS never die, they just don't give a hootOLD PACIFISTS never die, they just go to peacesOLD PARADOXES never die, they just
Category: Elderly Jokes - 0 Comments

A carpet-layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady.He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he'd lost hiscigarettes.In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. "Nosense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes," hesaid to himself. He proceeded to get out his hammer andflattened the hump.
Category: Situations - 0 Comments

|Q: What do you get when you play a new age song backwards?A: A new age song.Q: What happens if you sing country music backwards?A: You get your job and your wife back.Disco is to music what Etch-A-Sketch is to art.Q: How can you tell someone is a true music lover?A: When they even put their ear up to the bathroom keyhole.
Category: Instrument Jokes - 0 Comments

Igor: Only
this morning Dr Frankenstein
completed another amazing operation. He
crossed an ostrich with a
centipede.
Dracula: And what did he get?
Igor: We don't know - we
haven't managed to catch it yet.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments

|A client of a hospital where they made brain transplantations asked about the prices.The doctor said, "Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain belonged to a NASA top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a policeman's brain as well. It costs $50,000.
Category: Police Jokes - 0 Comments