
English is very strange
|
|Did you know that "verb" is a noun? How can you look up words in a dictionary if you can't spell them? If a word is misspelled in a dictionary, how would we ever know? If two mouses are mice and two louses are lice, why aren't two houses hice? If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you bote your tongue? If you've read a book, you can reread it. But wouldn't this also mean that you would have to "member" somebody in order to remember them? In Chinese, why are the words for crisis and opportunity the same? Is it a coincidence that the only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable? Is there another word for a synonym? Shouldn't there be a shorter word for "monosyllabic"? What is another word for "thesaurus"? Where do swear words come from? Why can't you make another word using all the letters in "anagram"? Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing? Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things? Why do people use the word "irregardless"? Why do some people type "cool" as "kewl?" Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? Why do we say something's out of order when its broken but we never say in of order when it works? Why does "cleave" mean both split apart and stick together? Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing? Why does the Chinese ideogram for trouble symbolize two women living under one roof? Why does X stand for a kiss and O stand for a hug? Why doesn't "onomatopoeia" sound like what it is? Why don't we say "why" instead of "how come"? Why is "crazy man" an insult, while to insert a comma and say "Crazy, man!" is a compliment? Why are a wise man and wise guy opposites? Why is abbreviation such a long word? Why is dyslexic so hard to spell? Why is it so hard to remember how to spell MNEMONIC? Why is it that no word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple? Why is it that the word "gullible" isn't in the dictionary? Why is it that we recite at a play and play at a recital? Why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? Why is the plural of goose-geese, and not the plural of moose-meese? Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards? Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
|
Rate Joke

Add Comment

Featured Jokes
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, "Lord, I have a problem!""What's the problem, Eve?""Lord, I know you've created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I'm just not happy.""Why is that, Eve?" came the reply from above."Lord, I am lonely.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head?All you can eat for under a buck.
Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
|At my cousin's wedding, my dad (who doesn't much care for his nephew's bride) thought it would be funny to flick his cigarette at her back as she walked down the aisle. It got caught in her hair and started to smolder. Her father had to get it out while she cried hysterically.
Category: Marriage Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Marriage Jokes - 0 Comments
A
schoolteacher was trying to teach her
six-year old class students how
to say the pledge of allegiance to
the flag. The schoolteacher said,
O.K.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
schoolteacher was trying to teach her
six-year old class students how
to say the pledge of allegiance to
the flag. The schoolteacher said,
O.K.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
God created Adam and informed him that he had given him a brain and a penis. The brain was a good gift as it allowed him to do many things.The penis was also a good thing as it allowed the race to continue. The problem was that God had only given Adam enough of a blood supply so that he could only use one of them at a time.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
What did Santa
Claus's wife say during a
thunderstorm?
'Come and look at the rain, dear.'
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
Claus's wife say during a
thunderstorm?
'Come and look at the rain, dear.'
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
Bumper stickers seen this weekend .....You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.I have the body of a god........Buddha.This would be really funny if it weren't happening to me.Cleverly disguised as a responsible adult.The face is familiar but i can't quite remember my name.Illiterate? Write for help.Honk if anything falls off.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
What kind of cat should you take into the
desert ?
A first aid kitty !
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
desert ?
A first aid kitty !
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments
What do you call an eternity?Four blondes in four cars at a four way stop.Why do blondes have TGIF written on their shoes?Toes Go In FirstThree blondes were driving to Disneyland. After being in the car for four hours, they saw a sign that said "Disneyland left." So they turned around and went home.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments


Common Menu

Joke Categories

Language
-
Jokes Search »
Browse Jokes »
English is very strange
All times are GMT. The time now is 08:46.

