Food jokes

What do builders use to make
websites?
Com.crete.
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Q: How can you identify a
computer that
has been in use at the Clinton White House?
A: There is White-out on
the screen.
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"Don't worry. I've had a vasectomy/hysterectomy." "I won't come in your mouth, I promise." "I'm not really married." "It's only a cold sore." "Looks aren't important to me. I like you for your personality." "Size isn't important." "This won't hurt, I promise." "We don't have to go all the way, we'll just lie here and hold each other.
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Q: Bill & Hilary Clinton are on a sinking ship, who gets saved? A: The nation!
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|After many years of marriage, a husband has turned into a couch potato, became completely inattentive to his wife and sat guzzling beer and watching TV all day. The wife was dismayed because no matter what she did to attract the husband's attention, he'd just shrug her off with some bored comment.
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Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket."How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asks an accountant. "Watch and you'll see," answers an engineer. They all board the train.
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Mummy Monster: What are you doing
with that saw and where's your
little brother ?
Young Monster:
Hee, hee ! He's my half-brother now!
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Old-fashioned Zachary approached Lureen's

father, intent upon asking him for her hand in marriage.

"Sir,"
he blurted out, "I have an attachment for your daughter, and
"


"See here, young man," interrupted the parent, "when my daughter

needs accessories, I'll buy them myself."
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Patient: Please tell me, doctor, am I getting better? Doctor: I think so. But to be sure, let me feel your wallet...
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A golfer, playing a round
by himself, is
about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up
to him, and
yells, "Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really
amazing to
show you!"

The golfer, annoyed, says, "What is it?"


"It's a special golf ball," says the salesman.
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