Heads and Tails

The IRS announced that obese Americans are entitled to certain tax breaks. Apparently, under the new rules, you're allowed to claim two or more chins as dependents.-Conan O'Brien
Category: Comedian Jokes - 0 Comments

INTERVIEWER to job
applicant: "Do you
think you could come up with any reason you want this
job other than
your parents want you out of their house?"
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How do footballers send messages?
By
referee-mail.
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Young
Actor: Dad, guess what? I've just
got my first part in a play. I play
the part of a man who's been
married for 30 years.
Father: Well, keep at it, son. Maybe one day
you'll get a speaking
part.
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Why do we drive on parkways when we park

on driveways?
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Sam's girlfriend's birthday was the same
day as his
father's. He bought his girlfriend a bottle of perfume
and his father a
pistol.

He wrapped the perfume and wrote a
note to his girlfriend, saying,
'Use this all over yourself and
think of me.'

Unfortunately he put the note on his father's
present.
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Judge: Your first marriage
was terminated by
death?
A: Yes, by death.
Judge: And by whose death was it
terminated?
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A New York boy was being led through the swamps ofLouisiana by his cousin. "Is it true that an alligator won'tattack you if you carry a flashlight?"The cousin smirked and replied, "Depends on how fast yacarry the flashlight."
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments

Why can't the blonde put in a light bulb? Shey kept breaking them with the hammer.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Why doesn't Santa have any children?Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
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