Mental health jokes

When do clocks die?
When their time is up.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then orders the bartender to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that it, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Q.What's te best pick up line in any state below the Mason-Dixon line? A.Get in the truck!
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

It seems that a devout, good couple was about to get married, but a tragic car accident ended their lives.When they got to heaven, they asked St. Peter if he could arrange for them to be married, saying that it was what they had hoped for in life, and they still desired wedded union. He thought about it and agreed, but said they would have to wait.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

A veterinarian surgeon had had a hell of a day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner, after which they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed.At about 2:00 in the morning, the phone rang. "Is this the vet?" asked an elderly lady's voice.
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments

Making the Least of Life
by Minnie
Mumm
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments

GeekonicsBy John WoestendiekPhiladelphia InquirerWed., January 8, 1997NEWS BULLETIN: Saying it will improve the education of children who have grown up immersed in computer lingo, the school board in San Jose, Calif., has officially designated computer English, or "Geekonics", as a second language.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Who Has The Best Memory?Three guys are debating who has the best memory.First guy says, "I can remember the first day of my First Grade class."Second guy says, "I can remember my first day at Nursery School!"Not to be outdone, the third guy says, "Hell, that's nothing...
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

A woman that was on her death-bed turned to her husband telling him he should get married soon after she'll die, to which the man said-OK.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Q: How does a blonde
high-5?
A: She
smacks herself in the forehead.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments