Monster jokes

Your richest relative buys a new house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
Category: Redneck Jokes - 0 Comments

Pfizer Corp (NYSE PFE) is making the announcement today that Viagra will soon be available in liquid form and will be marketed by Pepsi Cola Bottling Group (NYSE PBG) as a power beverage, suitable for use as-is, or a mixer, under the name "Mount and Do.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Sister Mary burst into the office of the

principal of Our Lady
of Perpetual Motion parochial school in an
advanced state of
agitation.
Category: More Jokes - 0 Comments

A very drunk man in a bar tells the bartender and everyone that issitting near him that he can fart out the tune to The Star Spangelled Banner!Everyone who hears this wants to see him do it. So he tells everyone togather around him, then he climbs up on the bar, drops his trousers and proceeds to take a massive dump on the bar counter.
Category: Drunks - 0 Comments

Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort to make the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining.Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:1. From a Southwest Airlines employee.... "There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."2.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Why'd the monkey fall outta the tree? 'cause he was dead...Why'd the other monkey fall outta the tree? 'cause he was dead too...Why'd the third monkey fall outta the tree?peer pressure...
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments

An attractive woman entered a pet shop. When the clerk offered assistance, she explained that she was recently divorced, and was looking for a small-ish dog for company.The clerk explained that the name of the store was 'Exotic Pets' and that, unfortunately, they did not stock cats, dogs, fish or any commonplace pets.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

Special High Intensity TeachingMemo to all students:In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivityFrom students, it will be our policy to keep all students welltaught through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TEACHING(S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give our students more S.H.I.T. than any other school.
Category: School - 0 Comments

Immodest Proposal #1: Daylight Savings Time Reform Richard S. Holmes, RICH@suhep.phy.syr.edu It happens every spring: crocuses, baseball (with any luck), and the switch toDaylight Savings Time (DST).Coming off DST is not hard.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments