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If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter? If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon? What do chickens think we taste like? What do people in China call their good plates? What do you call a male ladybug? What hair color do they put on the drivers license of a bald man? When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? When they first invented the clock, how did they know what time it was to set it? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? How is it possible to have a civil war? If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too? If you ate pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids?" Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song? If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkey's and apes? Whose cruel idea was it for the word lisp to have a "s" in it? If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
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Q: Where did the kittens go on their class
trip? - A: To a mewseum.
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trip? - A: To a mewseum.
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Q. What's te definition of a bachelor pad? A.
All the house plants are
dead, but there's something growing in the
refrigerator.
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All the house plants are
dead, but there's something growing in the
refrigerator.
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The dean of women at an exclusive girl's college was lecturing her students on sexual morality. "In moments of temptation," said the speaker to the class, "ask yourself just one question: Is an hour of pleasure worth a lifetime of shame?"A sweet young thing in the back of the room rose to ask: "How do you make it last an hour?"
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Category: ROOT - 0 Comments
Q.Why is there only one Yogi Bear?A. Because when they tried to make another one, they made a Boo-Boo.
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Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
|A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice.The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy."The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain.
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Category: Marriage Jokes - 0 Comments
A chemist, a shopkeeper and a teacher
were
sentenced to death by firing squad. The chemist was taken from
his cell
and as the soldiers took aim he shouted "Avalanche!" The
soldiers
panicked and in the confusion the chemist escaped. The
shopkeeper was led
out next. As the soldiers took aim he shouted
"Flood!" and escaped.
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were
sentenced to death by firing squad. The chemist was taken from
his cell
and as the soldiers took aim he shouted "Avalanche!" The
soldiers
panicked and in the confusion the chemist escaped. The
shopkeeper was led
out next. As the soldiers took aim he shouted
"Flood!" and escaped.
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"Honey," said Mrs.
Beldon to her
husband,
"Lester's teacher says he ought to have an encyclopedia."
"Encyclopedia, my eye!" exclaimed Beldon.
"Let him walk to
school like I did."
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Beldon to her
husband,
"Lester's teacher says he ought to have an encyclopedia."
"Encyclopedia, my eye!" exclaimed Beldon.
"Let him walk to
school like I did."
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What are the three fastest means of
communication?
Internet, telephone, telawoman.
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communication?
Internet, telephone, telawoman.
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Why did the skunk buy four boxes of
tissues?
Because he had a stinking cold!
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tissues?
Because he had a stinking cold!
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