My dad's a Lawyer

A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the subject of marriage counseling came up. "Oh, we'll never need that. My husband and I have a great relationship," the wife explained. "He was a communications major in college, and I majored in theater arts. He communicates really well, and I just act as if I'm listening."
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Knock Knock
Who's there !
Ankara
!
Ankara who ?
Ankara went off the cliff !
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YOU KNOW YOU'VE BEEN ON THE COMPUTER FOR TOO LONG...When asked about a bus schedule, you wonder if it is 16 or 32 bits.When you are counting objects, you go "0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C ,D...".When you dream in 256 palettes of 256 colors.
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Sister: Mom wants you to come in
and help fix
dinner. Brother: Why? Is it broken?
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Why was the lightning grilled on the
stove?


-To make heat lightning
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|Another on that I have seen pulled is to have someone speak out at the time the minister asks, "If anyone has good reason why these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace."They had a pregnant lady stand up and say, "Oh, never mind! I'll just call my lawyer!" It rattled the groom's mother so much that she fainted.
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Policeman: I've had my eye on you for
some
time now.
Young Lady: That's funny. I thought you were
arresting me for
speeding.
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Why are only 2% of blondes
touch-typists?
The rest are hunt'n peckers.
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Yo
mama so fat when she goes to an
amusement park, people try to ride
HER!
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When a car skidded on wet pavement
and struck a telephone pole,
several bystanders ran over to help the
driver.
A woman was the first to reach the victim, but a man rushed
in and
pushed her back.
"Step aside, lady," he barked. "I've
taken a course in first aid."
The woman watched him for a few
minutes, then tapped his shoulder.
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