pillsbury dough boy

QUESTION: How long does a United States
Congressman serve?
ANSWER: Until he gets caught.
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If two lawyers were drowning,
and you could
only save one of
them, would you read the paper or go to lunch?
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Q: Did you hear about the new
blonde paint?

A: It's not real bright, but it's cheap, and spreads easy.
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After a particularly poor game of
golf, a
popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home.
As
he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped

him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty

minutes ago?"

"Yes," the golfer responded.
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|Great truths about life that adults have learnedRaising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree. There is always alot to be thankful for if you take the time to look. For example: I'm sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.
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Only in America... Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance... Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink... Only in America...do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke... Only in America...
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"Only in America":...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance....are there handicapped parking places in front of a skating rink....do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke....do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters....
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Two men were changing in the locker room
after a game of tennis. One
notices the other one is putting on pair of
stockings and suspenders.
He says "When did you start wearing them?"
To which the other man
replies "Since my wife found a pair on the
back seat of the car."
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|A judge, bored and frustrated by a lawyer's tedious arguments, had made numerous rulings to speed the trial along. The attorney had bristled at the judge's orders, and their tempers grew hot.
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Q: How many alto sax
players does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: Five. One to handle the bulb, and 4 to
contemplate how David Sanborn
would've done it.
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