Various animal jokes

What fish make the best sandwich?
A peanut
butter and jellyfish
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What is the difference between a crazy bunny
and a
counterfeit banknote?
One is bad money and the other is a
mad bunny!
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A nude jogger was running past two old women.One had a stroke, the other missed!
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|The new Ensign was assigned to subs, where he'd dreamed of working since a young boy.He was trying to impress the Master Chief with his expertise learned in Submarine School. The Master Chief cut him off quickly and said, "Listen, 'sir', it's real simple. Add the number of times we dive to the number of times we surface. Divide that number by two.
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Where did the dog breeder keep his savings ? In
bark-lays
bank !
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Knock Knock
Who's there !
Courtney
Pine !
Courtney Pine who ?
Courtney Pine tables, I need a new one
!
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Like a lot of young women these days, one of our secretaries had worked long and hard to put her boyfriend through college. After he graduated and passed his bar exam, I asked her if they planned to be married soon. She looked at me with a big smile and said, "Oh no! Not right away. I want him to practice for at least six months first.
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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?One in a million become a human being.
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|10. Boy, if I had not recently shot up four sizes, that would've fit.9. It would be a shame if the garbage man ever accidentally took this from me.8. Perfect for wearing in the basement. 7. Well, well, well... 6. I really don't deserve this. 5. Gosh, I hope this never catches fire! 4. I Love it, but I fear the jealousy it will inspire. 3.
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Two elderlies are rocking on the porch at the home. "Bet you can't guess how old I am," he says. "Bet I can," she says. "Bet you fifty dollars you can't tell me how old I am," he says. "You're on," she says."Stand up." He stands up. She looks him up and she looks him down. "Now turn around," she says. She looks him up and she looks him down.
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