Various animal jokes

Q: How many Development Executives does

it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Well, first let's talk
about the concept behind this whole "light
bulb" thing.
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It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer.The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession.
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Yo mama
so fat when God said, "Let there
be light" he he to ask her to move
out of the way.
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Is it true the pigs went over
Niagara Falls in
a barrel?
No, that story's just a lot of hogwash.
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What do you call a mouse that can pick up a

monster?
Sir.
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Q: You go to a cockfight. How do you know if a Polak is there?A: He's the one with a duck.
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Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,

SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?
A: A blonde going through a flashing red
light.
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What's an accountant's idea of trashing
his hotel room?
Refusing to fill out the guest comment card.
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One of the fringe benefits of being an English or History teacher is receiving the occasional jewel of a student blooper in an essay. I have pasted together the following "history" of the world from certifiably genuine student bloopers collected by teachers throughout the United States, from eight grade through college level.
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I don't think this whole White House
scandal is good for
parents. I caught my six year old son David in a lie,
and he
said we could discuss it tonight in a "National Town
Meeting."
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