Various animal jokes

Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand
Canyon!
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|A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "If I show you a really good trick, will you give me a free drink?" The bartender considers it, then agrees. The man reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny rat. He reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a tiny piano. The rat stretches, cracks his knuckles, and proceeds to play the blues.
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Q: Did you hear about the Polak who studied for 5 days?A: He was scheduled to take a urine test.
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Q: How do blondes pierce their ears?
A: They
put tacks in their shoulder pads.
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There are only two things to worry about:Either you are well or you are sick.If you are well, there is nothing to worry about;but if you are sick, there are two things to worry about:either you will get well, or you will die.
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Did you hear about the village idiot

buying bird seed?
He said he wanted to grow some birds.
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Jesus and Moses are sitting in a boat fishing and Jesus says to Moses "I want to do a miracle so we can feel like the good old days." and Moses says "Yeah sure." So Jesus gets up and says "I think I'll walk on the water, that was always a good one." So Jesus walks over to the edge of the boat, steps into the water, and sinks like a stone.
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The frightened tourist: "Are

there any bats in this cave?"
The guide: "There were, but don't
worry, the snakes ate all of
them."
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Two nuns are riding a bike down a road and the firstnun says, "I`ve never come this way before!" and thesecond nun says, "Oh, it must be the cobblestone!"
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Have you heard about the slippery eel ?

Didn't think so, you wouldn't be able to grasp it !sna
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