Waiter jokes

Dad, can you
help me find the lowest common
denominator in this problem please?
Don't tell me that they
haven't found it yet, I remember looking for
it when I was a boy!
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How can you mend King Kong's arm if he's
twisted it?
With a monkey wrench.
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Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. Charlotte Whitton Guys are like dogs. They keep coming back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time...they're gone. Lenny Bruce I love women. They're the best thing ever created.
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Who was the most famous pirate
octopus?
Captain Squid!
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If the Pilgrims came over on the
Mayflower, how did the
barbers arrive?
On clipper ships.
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What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet? The Captain's log.
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Do you believe in love at first sight or do I
have to walk by
again?
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Two nuns were driving alone out in the

boonies. They ran out of gas.
Fortunately they could walk to a gas
station not far away, where they
asked to purchase a can of
gasoline. "I'm sorry, sister," said the
attendant, "but all I have for you
to carry it in is an old chamber
pot. The nuns agreed that this
would be fine.
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The man came home to find evidence that his wife had been unfaithful. "Was it my friend Steve?" he yelled. "No," she said. "Was it my friend James?" he then asked. "What?" she shouted. "Don't you think I have any friends of my own?"
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15 Pet Peeves Of Morticians...Best make-up artist in the world, but your models never make the cover of Cosmo.No moth, no Jodie Foster -- just leaves, dirt, and regular dead folks.Only 3 hits this month on the "World O' Coffins" web site.Tough to convince anyone to let you place bodies in action poses.
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