Waiter jokes

A man finally goes with his wife to church. The man was so impressedwith the preacher's sermon he stopped on the way out to shake his hand."Preacher, I'll tell you, that was a DAMNED fine sermon." The preachersays "Why thank you sir, but we don't used profanity in the house of the Lord".
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Q: Did you hear about the blonde that

almost caused a car accident?

A: The spare tire in her trunk blew
out.
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Recently
a teacher, a garbage
collector, and a lawyer wound up together at the
Pearly Gates. St.
Peter informed them that in order to get into Heaven,
they would each
have to answer one question.

St.
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A woman went to a discount store to purchase several items. When she finally got to the checker, she learned one of her items had no price.She thought she'd die of embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store to hear, "Price check on lane thirteen. Tampax. Supersize.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments

What did they tell the burger who enlisted in

the Army?
You've got no beef, soldier!
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Part of a Flight Attendant's arrival
announcement: "We'd like to
thank you folks for flying with us today.
And, the next time you get the
insane urge to go blasting through the
skies in a pressurized metal
tube, we hope you'll think of us here
at US Airways."
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A French guest, staying in a hotel in Edmonton phoned room service for some pepper."Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge."Toilette pepper!"
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A man goes to a bar and he ties his Great Dane up outside. About 10 minutes later a lady comes in and asks whos Great Dane is outside."Mine" says the man. "My dog has just killed him", she says."What breed is your dog?" he asks. "A Chiuahua", she says."How can a Chiuahua kill a Great Dane?" "He got caught in his throat!!!"
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Q: What do you do if you come across an elephant in the jungle?A: Wipe it off and say you're sorry.
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A precious little girl walks
into a pet
shop and asks in the sweetest
little lisp, "Excuthe me, mithter, do
you keep widdle wabbits?"

As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he
gets down on his knees, so that
he's on her level, and asks,


"Do you want a widdle white wabby or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabby
or
maybe one like that
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