Wanted: Woman!

Why
did the computer act crazy?
It had
a screw loose.
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"Open wider."
requested the dentist, as he
began his examination of the patient. "Good God
!" he said
startled. "You've got the biggest cavity I've ever seen
- the biggest
cavity I've ever seen." "OK Doc !" replied the
patient. "I'm scared
enough without you saying something like that twice."
"I didn't !"
said the dentist.
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A husband and wife entered the
dentist's
office. The husband said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want
gas
or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as

quickly as possible."

"You're a brave man," said the dentist.
"Now, show me which tooth
it is.
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Denied membership in an exclusive country
club because he was an
actor, biblical epic star Victor Mature is
reported to have said "Hell,
I'm no actor, and I've got thirty
movies to prove it!"
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"How can I believe in God when just last week I gotmy tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?" by Woody Allen.
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The teacher asked little Johnny if he knows his numbers."Yes," he said. "I do. My father taught me." "Good. What comes after three." "Four," answers the boy."What comes after six?" "Seven.""Very good," says the teacher. "Your dad did a good job. What comes after ten?""A Jack."
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A remedy for the common cold suggested by Dr. Richard Gordon, from the "Atlantic Monthly":At the first sign of a cold, go to bed with a bottle of whiskey and a hat. Place the hat on the left-hand bedpost. Take a drink of whiskey and move the hat to the right-hand bedpost. Take another drink and shift the hat back again.
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What do you call a horse that's been all around

the world?
A globe-trotter!
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Teacher: When you yawn, your supposed to put

your hand to your mouth!

Pupil: What?, and get bitten!
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|An investment counselor decided to go out on her own. She was shrewd and diligent, so business kept coming in, and pretty soon she realized that she needed an in-house counsel. The investment banker began to interview young lawyers.
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