
What's your wife's name?
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|St. Peter is questioning three married couples to see if they qualify for admittance to heaven."Why do you deserve to pass the Pearly Gates?" he asks one of the men, who had been a butler."I was a good father," he answers."Yes, but you were a drunk all your life. In fact, you were so bad you even married a woman named Sherry. No admittance."St. Peter then turned to the next man, a carpenter, and asked him the same question.The carpenter replied that he had worked hard and taken good care of his family.But St. Peter also rejected him, pointing out that he had been an impossible glutton, so much so that he married a woman named BonBon.At this point the third man, who had been a lawyer, stood up and said, "Come on, Penny, let?s get out of here."
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This one little boy in about 4th or 5th grade was trying out for a school play. He earned a part and went home to tell his father.His father was really proud of him. So his father asks what part did you get?He replies I got the part or a man who has been married for 25 years.His father congradulated him.
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Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Girlfriend: Will you love me when I'm old and
fat and ugly?
Boyfriend: Of course I do !
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fat and ugly?
Boyfriend: Of course I do !
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A farmer and his brand new bride were
riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the
older horse stumbled.
The farmer said, "That's
once."
A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again.
The
farmer said, "That's twice."
After a little, while the poor old
horse stumbled again.
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riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the
older horse stumbled.
The farmer said, "That's
once."
A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again.
The
farmer said, "That's twice."
After a little, while the poor old
horse stumbled again.
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|Liz: I get so nervous and frightened during driving tests!Doctor: Don't worry about it. You'll pass eventually.Liz: I'm the examiner!
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Q: What did the banana say to the vibrator??A: Why the hell are you shaking? Shes gonna eat me!
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Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Did you hear about the
Louisiana Tech
professor who stood in front of a mirror for two hours,
wondering where
he'd seen himself before?
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Louisiana Tech
professor who stood in front of a mirror for two hours,
wondering where
he'd seen himself before?
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Q: How many Sagittarians does it take to change
a
lightbulb? A: Look, ask me when I get back from India, okay?
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a
lightbulb? A: Look, ask me when I get back from India, okay?
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When Abraham Liebowitz
gets to school he
discovers that he is the only
Jewish kid in the class. But it's a
decent town and nobody really
bothers
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gets to school he
discovers that he is the only
Jewish kid in the class. But it's a
decent town and nobody really
bothers
him.
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|The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny.A normally sweet Great Dane Psil has one quirk: she hates United Parcel Service drivers.While walk Psil one day, around the corner of a house came a UPS man.
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Category: Real Jokes - 0 Comments
Once Santa Claus went to Ethiopia, to give the children some words of confort.He was there, with all those bony kids all around, and then they started yelling: "WE WANT TOYS!! WE WANT TOYS!!!"But then Santa, remembering his important job of orientating children to behave well, said: "A child who doesn't eat right doesn't get toys!!!"
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Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments


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