yo mama so fat.. cereal..

What did the baby owl's parents say when he
wanted
to go to a party?
You're not owld enough.
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A young man was lost wandering in a forest, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long, grey beard. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the Chinese man said, "but on one condition.
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I could have sworn I heard the can opener. Is there something I'm not getting when humans make noise with their mouths? Why doesn't the government do something about dogs? I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ULTERIOR motives? Hmmm ...
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A middle aged rancher in pioneer days of old, had growen tired of working so hardto build a beautiful ranch house and huge herd to go with it. So he thought itwould be nice to get one of those mail order brides. Well he sent for one andon the day she was arriving he hitched up his horse and buggy and headed for thenearest train station.
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Which flavor ice cream is Dracula's favorite?

Vein-illa.
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Did you hear why they closed the Seattle
Kingdom?

While the crowd was doing the wave, two blondes drowned.
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My wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to our six- year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" I wouldn't know what to say," she replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say," my wife instructed. Our daughter bowed her head and said: "Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner"!
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Who do hamburgers love on TV?
Archie
Bunker's son-in-law, the meathead!
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Why
did the vampire have pedestrian eyes?

They looked both ways before they crossed.
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I saw you across a crowded room. Among all the others that were there, The lights seemed to shine down on you alone. I knew then I had to have you for my own.Willingly, you came with me to my home. From the car, I carried you & threw open the door. Looking at you ,I admire your body, your well shaped legs, and breasts.
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