Blonds
A blonde decided that she was tired of her empty life. She cut her hair and dyed it brown, and set off for a drive. She wanted to do random acts of kindness to see if it would change her life.While driving through the countryside, she came across a farmer who was trying to get his sheep across the road.
Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a phone booth? A1: You need a quarter to use the phone. A2: Only one person can use the phone at once.
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Q. Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?A. It took her a month to realize she could play it at night.
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Judi and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends.Brunette: Last night I had *three* orgasms in a row!Judi: That's nothing; last night I had over a hundred.Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.Judi: (looking shocked) Oh, you mean with one guy.
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
The complaint letter from Judi:We blonds at the ofise are tired of all the the dum stoopid jokes about us. We think this is hairassment. It causes us grate stress and makes our roots turn dark. We have hired a loyer and he is talking to the loyers at Clairol. We will take this all the way to the supream cort if we have two.
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Blondes dumb?!?!? After many hours of extremely acrobatic and exhausting sex with ablonde he had just picked up, a man goes into the kitchen for some foodto replenish his justspent energy. He pours himself a glass of milkand right before drinking it, he realizes his manhood is still prettyhot,so he sticks it in the glass to cool it off.
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
A blonde and a brunette were talking one day. The brunette saidthat her boyfriend had a slight dandruff problem but she gave him "Headand Shoulders" and it cleared it up. The blonde asked inquisitively,"How do you give shoulders?"
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
A blond at a party was telling her friend thatshe was off men for life. "They lie, they cheatand they're just no good. From now on when I wantsex, I'm going to use my vibrator""So, what when the batteries run out?" asked her friend"I'll just fake an orgasm like always."
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Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Random Jokes
Specify that your drive-through order is "to go." If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up." Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Q: How can you tell a blonde is being
unfaithful?
A: Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for
penicillin.
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unfaithful?
A: Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for
penicillin.
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Two fags are on a picnic,and the first guy says,"I have to take adumpski,"and he walks into the woods to do it. Several minutes later,the other guy hears the first guy crying"Boo Hoo,I Had A Miscarriage.I Had A Miscarriage." He runs into the woods to see what is going on.
Category: Science - 0 Comments
Category: Science - 0 Comments
There are two guys walking in front of a large church. One guy says to the other, "Just a minute, I'll be right back."He goes into the confessional and says, "Father forgive me, for I have sinned. I have had two extramarital affairs." The Father says, "You need to say 40 Hail Marys,and I also need to know if the women were members of my parish.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
yo
mama's teeth so yellow that when she
smiles everyone sings, "i got
sunshine on a cloudy day".....
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mama's teeth so yellow that when she
smiles everyone sings, "i got
sunshine on a cloudy day".....
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A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her.She jumped up and slapped him silly.He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
"What flavors of ice cream
do you have?"
inquired the customer.
"Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate,"
answered the new waitress in a
hoarse whisper.
Trying to be
sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have
laryngitis?"
"No...."
replied the new waitress with some effort, "just...erm....
vanilla,
strawberry, and chocolate."
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do you have?"
inquired the customer.
"Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate,"
answered the new waitress in a
hoarse whisper.
Trying to be
sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have
laryngitis?"
"No...."
replied the new waitress with some effort, "just...erm....
vanilla,
strawberry, and chocolate."
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A client of a hospital where they made brain
transplantations asked
about the prices.
The doctor said,
"Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain
belonged to a NASA
top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a
policeman's brain as
well. It costs $50,000.
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transplantations asked
about the prices.
The doctor said,
"Well, this Ph.D. brain costs $10,000. This brain
belonged to a NASA
top scientist and costs $15,000. Here we have a
policeman's brain as
well. It costs $50,000.
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Denied membership in an exclusive country
club because he was an
actor, biblical epic star Victor Mature is
reported to have said "Hell,
I'm no actor, and I've got thirty
movies to prove it!"
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club because he was an
actor, biblical epic star Victor Mature is
reported to have said "Hell,
I'm no actor, and I've got thirty
movies to prove it!"
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The defendant
stood up in the dock and said
to the judge, "I dont recognize this
court!"
"Why?" asked the
Judge.
"Because you've had it decorated since the last time I was
here."
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stood up in the dock and said
to the judge, "I dont recognize this
court!"
"Why?" asked the
Judge.
"Because you've had it decorated since the last time I was
here."
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