Medicine
A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear."What's the matter with me?" he asks the doctor.The doctor replies, "You're not eating properly."
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
An eye-doctor was having his 40th birthday, and gathered lotsof friends and family in his house. His wife had made him a surprise cake, and led her husband blindfolded to a table where the cake was placed.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
A Short History of MedicineI have an earache...2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer.1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this potion.1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill.1985 A.D. - That pill is ineffective. Here, take this antibiotic.2000 A.D.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Proctologists Of all the professions we fear, one stands out. No, it's not "mortician;" by then it's too late. This is a word that makes a certain part of our anatomy pucker in anticipation. Yes, the word is "proctologist;" the dreaded p-word! The mere mention of the word strikes terror deep inside most of us.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Psychiatric HotlineIf you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
A husband and wife are on a nudist beach when suddenly awasp buzzes into the wife's business end. Naturally enough,she panics.The husband is also quite shaken but manages to put a coaton her, pull up his shorts and carries her to the car. Then hemakes a mad dash to the doctor.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Howard had felt guilty all day long. No matter how much he tried to forget about it, he couldn't. The guilt and sense of betrayal was overwhelming. But every once in a while he'd hear that small inner voice trying to reassure him, "Howard. Don't worry about it.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
A woman consulted a doctor, explaining that for many years she sufferred from excessive flatulance, but there was never any sound or smell so she had done nothing about it until now. So the Dr. took down all of her medical history,a process that took quite a while.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
A man walks in to a doctors office and says, "Doctor you must help me. I have AIDS." The doctor replies, "Are you gay?" The man answers "yes." The doctor says, "I think I can help. Go to the grocery store, buy a box of laxatives and a quart of prune juice.Take ALL of the laxatives and drink ALL of the prune juice.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Random Jokes
What do elves learn in school?The ELF-abet.How many reindeer does Santa have?11 (named below):Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen,Rudolph (the one with the red nose),Olive (all of the other reigndeer)and Al (Then Al the reigndeer loved him all).
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Once, a gay man went to heaven. At the Great Gate, Saint Peter was waiting for him. After rewieving his records Saint Pete decided to let him in. "Follow me" he said, opening the gate and walking in.After some walk, Saint Pete's keys accidentally fell on the ground. Unaware, he bent over to pick up the keys.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
What do you call it when one rabbit challenges
another
rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?
A hare
dare.
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another
rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?
A hare
dare.
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When should you feed milk to a baby elephant
?
When it's a baby elephant !
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?
When it's a baby elephant !
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The
Americans and Japanese decided to
engage in a boat race. Both teams
practiced hard and long to reach
their peak performance levels. On the big
day they felt ready. The
Japanese won by a mile.
The American team was discouraged by the
loss. Morale sagged.
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Americans and Japanese decided to
engage in a boat race. Both teams
practiced hard and long to reach
their peak performance levels. On the big
day they felt ready. The
Japanese won by a mile.
The American team was discouraged by the
loss. Morale sagged.
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After much soul searching and having determined the husband was infertile, the childless couple decided to try artificial insemination.When the woman showed up at the clinic, she was told to undress from the waist down, get on the table and place her feet in the stirrups.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
A highly timid little man, ventured into a biker barin the Bronx and clearing his throat asked, "Um, err,which of you gentlemen owns the Doberman tied outsideto the parking meter?"A giant of a man, wearing biker leathers, his bodyhair growing out through the seams, turned slowly onhis stool, looked down at the quivering little manand said, "It's
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments
Category: Animal World - 0 Comments
A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you should be interested in: Becoming A Real Man. That's right, in just six trimesters, you, too, can be a real man-as well as earn an MA Degree (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
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