Medicine
What's the worst part about getting a lung transplant?The first couple of times you cough, its not your phlegm...
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
What is red and sticky and crawls up a girls thigh?A home-sick abortion.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
The medical student was asked four reasons why mother'smilk was better for babies than cow's milk. This is the answer he submitted: 1. It's fresher. 2. It's cleaner. 3. The cats can't get to it. 4. It's easier to take on a picnic. He also added: "It comes in such cute containers."
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Two doctors were in a hospital hallway one daycomplaining about Nurse Jenny. "She's incrediblydumb. She does everything absolutely backwards."said one doctor. "Just last week, I told her togive a patient 2 milligrams of percocet every 10hours. She gave him 10 milligrams every 2 hours.He nearly died on us!" The second doctor said,"That's nothing.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
A man and a woman were waiting at the hospital donation center.Man: "What are you doing here today?"Woman: "Oh, I'm here to donate some blood. They're going to giveme $5 for it."Man: "Hmm, that's interesting. I'm here to donate sperm, myself.But they pay me $25.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
There was a costume party at a mental hospital; the theme of the party was "war". The first person comes up onto the stage and says, "I'm an atomic bomb." He gets his applause and steps down.The second person comes up and says, "I'm a hydrogen bomb." Again, there's applause and he steps down.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
A man went to the doctor's. The doctor came in and said,"Well, I've got some good news and some bad news. The badnews is that you have an inoperable brain tumor.
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Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
What is the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer? The taste.
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Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
What do you do when an epilectic takes a bath? Throw in your laundry.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said:"Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insultyou by offering payment. But I would like for you to know thatI had mentioned you in my will.
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Category: Medicine - 0 Comments
Random Jokes
Turmoil rocked Heaven this morning as allegations arose that God had had an affair with a former worshiper.The scandal was begun when a 21 year old woman, known only as Mary, claimed that she had given birth to God's "only son" last week in a barn in the hamlet of Bethlehem.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
''Have you heard my knock-knock joke?''
asked the blonde.
''No,'' said the brunette.
''Okay,'' said the blonde, ''you start.''
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asked the blonde.
''No,'' said the brunette.
''Okay,'' said the blonde, ''you start.''
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This guy is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years.One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, "It's not a ship." The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, "It's not a boat." The speck gets even closer and he thinks, "It's not a raft.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Happily Addicted to the Web (Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland")Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin', From my mouth, drool is glist'nin', I'm happy--although My boss let me go-- Happily addicted to the Web.All night long, I sit clicking, Unaware time is ticking, There's beard on my cheek, Same clothes for a week, Happily addicted to the Web.
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Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
What do you do if a blond throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.
Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
Category: Blonds - 0 Comments
A number twelve walks into a
bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.
"Sorry I can't
serve you," states the barman.
"Why not?!" asks the number
twelve with anger showing in its voice.
"You're under 18," replies
the barman.
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bar and asks the barman for a pint of beer.
"Sorry I can't
serve you," states the barman.
"Why not?!" asks the number
twelve with anger showing in its voice.
"You're under 18," replies
the barman.
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little boy : mummy is god a girl or a boy? mummy: why god is both girl and boy little boy: mummy is god black or white? mummy: why god is both black and white little boy: mummy is god gay or strait? mummy: why god is both gay and strait little boy: mummy is god Michael Jackson?
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
A man walks into a bar on
the top floor of a
skyscraper. He sits down and orders a beer. After
taking a drink he sees
the guy next to him go over to the window
and jump out!
"Holy cow! Did you see that!? That guy just jumped out
the window!"
The bartender does nothing.
So the man
takes another sip.
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the top floor of a
skyscraper. He sits down and orders a beer. After
taking a drink he sees
the guy next to him go over to the window
and jump out!
"Holy cow! Did you see that!? That guy just jumped out
the window!"
The bartender does nothing.
So the man
takes another sip.
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