Religion
The congregation was sitting and waiting for the preacherto began his sermon when two masked men burst into thechurch and said "Whoever is not willing to take a bulletfor Jesus better leave now." More than half of thecongregation jumped up and ran out the door.
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
The girl knelt in the confessional and said,"Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.""What is it, child?""Father, I have committed the sin of vanity.Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirrorand tell myself how beautiful I am."The priest turned, took a good look at the girl,and said, "My dear, I have good news. That isn'ta sin...
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Noah And Today's ArkThe Lord spoke to Noah and said, "Noah, in six months I am goingto make it rain until the whole world is covered with water andall the evil things are destroyed. But, I want to save a few goodpeople and two of every living thing on the planet. I am orderingyou to build an ark.
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
There are three religious truths:1. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.2. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the Christian faith.3. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at Hooters
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
A Friend's PrayerMay the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person whoscrews up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.Amen
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
The Pope calls a meeting of all the cardinals. When they have all assembled at the Vatican, he takes them into the meeting hall and states, "I have some really fantastic news and some very terrible news." Of course, all the cardinals want to hear the good news first, so the Pope tells them, "Jesus Christ has returned to the world.
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Do you know what happens if you don't pay your exorcist?You get repossessed!
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Visual joke.:Stand with both arms outstreached level with your shoulders.Ask: "what's this?" - A really crappy way to spend Easter.
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?One, but for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Category: Religion - 0 Comments
Random Jokes
|Ornaments would be priced slightly higher, but would hang on the tree remarkably quickly. Also the colors of the ornaments would be prettier than most all the others. Options would be available for 'equalization' of color combinations on the tree.
Category: Computing Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Computing Jokes - 0 Comments
Happiness is defined as opening your refrigerator to find your mother-in-law's picture on the milk carton.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
How to identify a Canadian driver:1. - One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: MONTREAL2. - One hand on wheel, one finger out window: TORONTO3. - One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: OTTAWA4. - Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: SASKATOON, but driving in TORONTO5.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Why did
the cannibal eat the tightrope
walker?
He wanted a balanced meal.
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the cannibal eat the tightrope
walker?
He wanted a balanced meal.
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At our local
restaurant you can eat
dirt cheap - but who wants to eat dirt?
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restaurant you can eat
dirt cheap - but who wants to eat dirt?
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On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised
to see a parrot strapped
in next to him. He asks the stewardess for
a coffee where upon the
parrot squawks "And get me a whisky you
cow!" The stewardess, flustered,
brings back a whisky for the parrot
and forgets the coffee.
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to see a parrot strapped
in next to him. He asks the stewardess for
a coffee where upon the
parrot squawks "And get me a whisky you
cow!" The stewardess, flustered,
brings back a whisky for the parrot
and forgets the coffee.
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A man walks into a New York bank, and says he's going to Europe for two weeks and needs to borrow $5000. For collateral, he offers his new Rolls Royce.The bank is satisfied and parks it in their secured underground garage. Two weeks later to the day, the man returns to the bank, repays the $5000 and interest of $15.41.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Why was Santa's little helper
depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
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depressed?
Because he had low elf esteem.
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Two elderly ladies were outside their nursing
home, having a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies
pulled
out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and
continued
smoking.
The lady asked, "What's that?"
"A
condom," the other lady responded. "This way my cigarette
doesn't
get wet.
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home, having a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies
pulled
out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and
continued
smoking.
The lady asked, "What's that?"
"A
condom," the other lady responded. "This way my cigarette
doesn't
get wet.
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