War
A young, freshly minted lieutenant was sent to Bosnia as part of the peace keeping mission. During a briefing on land mines, the captain asked for questions.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
At the morning roll call at Fort Dix, the sergeant called out,"Platoon, atten-HUT! Private Martinez, report to the office. Your brother died last night."The Chaplain, Rabbi Horowitz, looked on in horror. "Sergeant," he saidafterwards, "that's a rather cruel and unfeeling way to break tragic news.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
Two men were boasting to each other about their old army days. "Why, my outfit was so well drilled," declared one, "that when they presented arms all you could hear was slap, slap, click.""Very good," conceded the other, "but when my company presented arms you'd just hear slap, slap, jingle.""What was the jingle?" asked the first.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
British Military Officer Fitness ReportsThe British Military writes OFR's (officer fitness reports). The form usedfor Royal Navy and Marines fitness reports is the S206. The following areactual excerpts taken from people's "206's"....- His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.- I would not breed from this Officer.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
During the Vietnam war, a Lieutenant asked a Marine why he was falling back during a really fierce battle. "Didn't you hear me say that we're outnumbered 4 to 1 ?" The Marine replied, "I got my four Sir."
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
There's a guy from ARMY driving from West Point to the Meadowlands, a guy from the NAVY was driving from Annapolis to the Meadowlands, and an Air Force guy who's driving from McGwire in South Jerz to the Meadowlands just to watch the Jets.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
A sailor and a marine are taking a piss at a public restroom. The marine finishes first and washes his hands. The sailor just walks to the exit. So the marine says to him: hey, in the marines they teach us to wash our hands after taking a piss. The sailor says: yeah well, in the navy they teach us to not piss on our hands.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
MESSAGE FROM THE DUKE OF WELLINGTON TO THE BRITISH FOREIGN OFFICE IN LONDON-- written from Central Spain, August 1812 Gentlemen, Whilst marching from Portugal to a position which commands the approach to Madrid and the French forces, my officers have been diligently complying with your requests which have been sent by H.M.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
From one of Tom Clancy's books:Commanding officer: "Alright! How about an attitude check???" Crew (In Unison): "I HATE THIS FUCKING PLACE!" CO: "Now, let's be more positive..." Crew: "I POSITIVELY HATE THIS FUCKING PLACE!" CO: "OK, How about a negative attitde check...
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
A marine general, an army general and a navy admiral were discussing who had the toughest men. The army general says, "Alright, I'll prove the army has the toughest men in the country.
Category: War - 0 Comments
Category: War - 0 Comments
Random Jokes
A blonde and a brunette both jumped off a cliff at the same time. Which made it to the ground first? The brunette because the blonde had to stop and ask for directions.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
Category: Miscellaneous - 0 Comments
|Two musicians are walking down the street, and one says to the other, "Who was that piccolo I saw you with last night?" The other replies, "That was no piccolo, that was my fife."
Category: Instrument Jokes - 0 Comments
Category: Instrument Jokes - 0 Comments
A mother was reading a book about animals to
her 3 year old daughter. Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child:
"Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother:
"Oh, you're so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed
little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her deepest voice
replied, "Bud."
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her 3 year old daughter. Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child:
"Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother:
"Oh, you're so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed
little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her deepest voice
replied, "Bud."
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If two lawyers were drowning,
and you could
only save one of
them, would you read the paper or go to lunch?
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and you could
only save one of
them, would you read the paper or go to lunch?
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Have you heard that there's a new
mountain website?
Really? I must take a peak at it!
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mountain website?
Really? I must take a peak at it!
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An older woman was in the pastoral study counceling for her upcoming fourth wedding. "Father," she said, "How am I going to tell my husband that I am still a virgin?" "My child, you have been a married woman for many years. Surely that cannot be," he replied.
Category: Legal - 0 Comments
Category: Legal - 0 Comments
An honest seven-year-old admitted calmly to
her parents that
Billy Brown had kissed her after class.
"How did that happen?, " gasped her mother.
"It wasn't easy,"
admitted the young lady, "but three girls helped
me catch him!"
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her parents that
Billy Brown had kissed her after class.
"How did that happen?, " gasped her mother.
"It wasn't easy,"
admitted the young lady, "but three girls helped
me catch him!"
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A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travelbag onto the plane. Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed tostuff it in the overhead bin. "Do you always carry such heavy luggage?" she sighed."No more," the man said. "Next time, I'm riding in the bag, and my partner can buy the ticket!"
Category: Travel - 0 Comments
Category: Travel - 0 Comments
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War
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