Yo Mama Jokes

Standing at the
edge of the lake, a man
saw a woman flailing about in the deep water.
Unable to swim, the man
screamed for help. A trout fisherman ran up. The
man said, "My wife
is drowning and I can't swim. Please save her.
I'll give you a
hundred dollars."
The fisherman dove into the water.
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How do fireflies lose weight?
They burn
calories.
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What do you do when a Chihuahua sneezes?
Get a
small hankie!
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Which fly captured the ladybird?
The
dragon-fly.
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|A surgeon and an architect, both English, were joined by an Irish politician, and all fell to arguing as to whose profession was the oldest. Said the surgeon, "Eve was made from Adam's rib, and that surely was a surgical operation." "Maybe," said the architect, "but prior to that, order was created out of chaos, and that was an architectural job.
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What kind of clothes are there?women: clean & dirtyMen: Clean,almost clean,sorta clean,not bad,dirty,really dirty,nasty ,biohazzard.(Men will voluntarily wear all but the last classification ofthese clothes).
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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.Insanity is my only means of relaxation.Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets.You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
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Mrs. McKenzie was showing Corbett, the
contractor,
through the second floor of her new house to show him what
colors to paint
the rooms. "I'd like the bathroom done in white!"


Corbett walked over to the window and shouted, "Green up! Green
up!"

"I want the bedroom in blue!" continued the woman.
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YESTERDAY---------------Ye sterday,All those backups seemed a waste of pay.Now my database has gone away.Oh I believe in yesterday.Suddenly,There's not half the files there used to be,And there's a milestonehanging over meThe system crashed so suddenly.I pushed something wrongWhat it was I could not say.
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"Father! Father! An old man on crutches walked up to the holy water a minute ago, and he splashed some on his right leg and then he threw away his right crutch! Then he splashed some more on the other leg and threw away his left crutch!" "My boy, you've witnessed a miracle! What happened then?" "He fell on his ass Father he's a
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